Poems 2021
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Above the Fray
star blooms within a dark arc . . . ahhh . . . a window, open in this cathedral, lets a crow come cawing into lofty calm; undetected thoughts shift, create a rift pull away from starry, or purple, or blue-black third-eye nave; wise serpent's eye in Love coos "no matter who you are, what you have to say, move along for now, go on your way;" . . . dove-gentle return to seek You let go as Spirit hovers over the deep . . . over the face of the waters . . . above the fray . . . til another crow enters the nave to be Loved away. |
Spark
Seeking a way through shell; a hammer's hit won't do; no will to consume but rather exhume a soul trapped within; "wise as serpent, gentle as dove,' eyes, ears with tender love, sharp attention, the Helper winds, finds its way to coo and kick start a spark between two. "Be wise as serpents, gentle as doves." Matthew 10:16 "In the beginning,
God created the heavens and the earth. The earth was without form and void, and darkness was over the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God was hovering over the face of the waters." - Genesis 1:1-2 |
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Caste
Dalits, Blacks, Jews all know the suffering doesn't stay below but sickens those "on top," who pull out all stops to keep purity "pollution" free safe guard heredity scripture-led sanctity so deluded as to believe we are free; what happens to someone who bows down to the who's who? do they sleep at night? awake in fright? ever mend fences? suffer eternal consequences? conscience obliterated day after day by distractions, injections of confirmations that entitlement is heaven-sent; the British crown, declared divinity, imprisoned a woman in palatial penitentiary; there she lived a severed quark puking in the dark captured in caste superiority Diana! goddess of childbirth locked up, alone to produce two for the throne once accomplished went home crushed bone; cause? supposedly a bad Mercedes but really from heart dis-ease. Dutch Sisters Corrie, Betsy Ten Boome hid Jews S. S. threw father and the two into Ravensbruck watched Reich women brutalize; Betsy, under breath, agonized, "those poor women" please realize she spoke of the Germans, not the Jews. frozen souls lost within the lie's noose (Betsy therein died Corrie survived and thrived to tell her truth.) Roger Ailes Fox founder sex assailed, "want to play with the boys? gotta lay with the boys." so women sucked or got fucked, men kissed ass bought the razz ma tazz as he raised Nixon, Reagan, Bush, and Trump, to claim the mightiest tree stump til Murdock him dethroned locked out removed his clout, no longer reigned in his high rise domain; His name said it all, Roger AILS. this country, birthed an economy of kick-off-a-craving commodities: cotton, sugar, tobacco... that to-this-day require slavery minimum-wage 'bout seven twenty; But "dominant" lead in suicides, psych meds, impotence in bed; meaning-sapped lives struggle to make peace inside with the great divide; Let's rebirth society in love that's steadfast, the opposite of caste, move towards a greater we shared humanity, take care of those in poverty, live for equality not assessed in money since the LORD declared "you will always have the poor" so rather listen, seek to meet the universal need for love and human dignity. "Caste" by Isabel Wilkerson inspired this piece. . |
Mistaken Identity
brilliant women belt back and forth, "you bitch!!!” brother watches, boyfriends switch feet, lean against Ford's door engaged by the flame of match-hit-gas rage; the "good-looks" commodity, distributed unevenly brewed jealousy, birthed enmity, a tall-false tale built on fear of not-enough, none-for-me, who-will-ever-want-me? people! we got to go back we're under attack from downloaded fabrications: Mad-Madison ave machinations; craving-crop plantations that bear witness to the mess of spirits frayed, communities decayed; ancestors weep for daughters caught in this current curb-side heap of insanity see roots in soul poverty: "Lord, deliver them, protect them, help them to see their common adversary - the thief that's suppressed child-of-God identity; get them to heal, believe what's real; Lord, LORD, no good comes from this by-product, of mistaken identity." *** |
Exiled
exiled from Eden by need to GET OUT! inner mandate to separate disconnect defect, can't stay and SUFFOCATE got to ESCAPE; flee from first home, to mock, scoff in the un - ease til it could be no more; truth got through in a liquor store "that's killing me;" had believed family men, city to blame, ‘til Pain bore on that stiff neck "I'm going to die or live in this train wreck!" reborn from that crash in the 12-Step path a mud-born lotus connected with something GOOD without an "owe" and so she testifies to a way home to a one-day-at-a time manna-ALTER of God-consciousness; with people, Spirit siblings with one another yet alone feeling, healing, wild, exiled to a new home. |
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Pearl
pearl is formed from sand irritation... inner protection mechanism lubricates the aggravation germinates a jewel, One that matters most, reflects Light that neither begins nor ends shows a different way to roll through this world each day unfurls a flow "where do you want me to go?" "what do you want me to know?" invisible, yet many lives bear witness; continue to seek its guidance, abundance, sacred emptiness, singleness, of the One pearl and leave the rest. "The Parable of the Pearl of Great Value Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant in search of fine pearls, who, on finding one pearl of great value, went and sold all that he had and bought it." Matthew 13:45-46 |
Spirit Friend, I Miss You!
I'm a sojourner, rolling, homesick for a woman and her other-world I now want to know; I'm a dreamer waiting, praying for my friend to return seeking to eliminate the fear that drove her away so long ago huddled with hands, covers clasped under chin "go away!" "go away!" and she did and my Spirit friend has not been back since; when I go deep within to the inner dissolved dome, there is a cramp a clamp, the closure of a vault that won't budge; and she was the one who asked me to grasp, to see fearsome truth: "Do you know infinity?" |
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Bok Choy Moment
I live in a home I did not build, sleep in a bed I did not construct, gobble up greens I did not plant, think with a mind I did not make. I reap all day what I do not sow: warmth, comfort, food, home; yet in the garden I somehow know to leave that luminous bok choy alone that someone else has lovingly sown. |
Ronald: In Loving Memory
Homeless, said "yes" too tired to "no," after sincere ones insist "live inside"' from not-for-profit determined to provide but... 40 years living on streets meant he was positioned perfectly, consistently miserable but free, with a deep allergy to four walls in section-8 sanctuary so… he died on the sidewalk last Saturday; flew away rather than live another way. In loving memory of Ronald (Ronnie) Joe Smith 3/20/2021 |
Hold On!
is this pandemic making me monastic? a "nun with none" anorexic? meditation deep, kittens sleep in lap "resist, retain, react to no thought, return to the Word;" am I zombified in a cathedral inside or finding a way to a holy state? something within's pushing back don't want to be a spiritual quack but do need to be surrendered vertically, horizontally - in the world yet aligned to Thee neither trapped, nor caged by this inner see. |
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In Love with a Confederate
I fell in love with a confederate soldier dashing, energized by soul, who donned a solid refusal to un-puff his pride, relished judgement, didn't hide delight in excess, prowess, whiskey, women, homes, prestige he seemed rebellious, to be free unchained from stiff society; well known to me his cruelty, aggression, stood fast at center of attention competitor, money-maker, a "man's man," he thrived on games wherein the fittest survive; I received an invitation to conditional participation based on certain stipulations to fan, flatter vanity; and oh how good it feels to be in the team that wins, the crop's cream; never mind those on the sidelines disregard the castaways, flying high above the rest, be the king's protege! |
Prisoners
in beautiful bones encased magnificent face high class and a great ass, pampered pet asset signet; wants a woman to attest to him as best; and she? what’s going on down under? thunder? a maelstrom of rudderless wit flits, flirts deserts, dodges, skirts responsibility whipping out winding in needle-in-a-haystack pin constantly controlling him, cattle prod of whim; how can God take this lovely-to-behold daughter of wrath and turn her towards his path? release her heart of flesh from its steel mesh? only divine Power penetrates the babble tower extricates these beauty queens from behind the seen the coveted construct which too-often soul destructs. |
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Pep Talk
the LORD said, "monastic life's not for you stay in and push up your sleeves; pray to know the next step to transform stiff-necked bones and stones to those who hear flutes, feel tears, dance to drums, cries, ALIVE! use money, talent, skill; stay in the messy thick of it that's where you belong, single in the mix (not celibate) with one holy purpose to move through WITH PEOPLE with me, in my energy!" |
Prayer
Enlarge this tent, LORD, push past the crust of my selfishness dissolve me into this very place; pour out love where you need it to go! Only here am I positioned only here will my love be known as your hand, as your love, presence, as the truth of who you are and I am not; don't let people be confused, "Oh, thank you. You are wonderful!" let them jolt let them wake up and experience deep down the truth of the Source. "Enlarge the place of your tent and let the curtains of your habitations be stretched out: do not hold back: lengthen your cords and strengthen your stakes." - Isaiah 54:2 |
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Sacred Friend
Sings "happy little bluebirds fly beyond the rainbow" at the deli news machine on Wilshire; or doubles over by the kitchen, naked, laughing, balls dangling story telling or cigar smoking, alights fingers into roasted nuts coffee with creamer (hazelnut), sleeps face up, sensitive snorer, soft skin, cell always rings moving energy from here to there, realty, numbers king; don't try to tame or shame or invade hands off everything but listen, love, enjoy this Louisiana boy who flows goodness, echoes mysteries from the sky, from ages gone by, assumes it's truth, "why oh why can't I?" |
Forget Me Not
I pray my heart might be the way someone hears our God today; who has no lips, no pad, no pen so needs me to show up when some person's lost or ego-bound needs to hear that they are found, the One they seek, (or have forgot), designed us to "forget me not." |
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The Body
a dwelling a tabernacle; a breath, mystical body; close eyes, move up from root through this transient architecture just within door waits a sacrificial altar attachments cremated to the wash bowl, of melted copper mirrors cleanse after the blood letting, the burning; enter food of truth daily bread surprised by evidence of capacity to hear sparks a new heart, of flesh, of rich black earth Al-Kemi has happened now prepared to speak words emerge from throat - as incense diffusing new, good news access to third eye sight balance lest pride override when words do cause an affect culminating connection to Power the Mercy Seat. infinite forgiveness for inevitable humanity; a dwelling a tabernacle; in constant pulse, process, a mystical body close your eyes, to move within this infinite architecture |
Natural Birth
when accidents happen sickness is acute some pray for life, but expect death, are surprised by medical attention that's not a hack job; a "good doctor's" a friend who softens hard blows not a skilled craftsman who knows where or when to go or not go; and who's to say that 's not better all you seekers of "the best medical care"? stay out of my body! let it heal itself til it can no more til whatever life force tips to the exit door and I'll thank my soul's bony home, and hope to keep very quiet inwardly know "I'm getting close," so no one says, "try this" and takes away my one shot at natural birth out of this Earth. |
Two Serpents
Once upon a time were two serpents, one wise, one cruel almost identical though the latter's skin had a few dry, shiny patches . one moved, gentle as a dove observing entry points for the living God, nudging beings into light, "Keep going," "I know what you mean," "That's a false belief," "Look how new Power is showing up," "Keep giving it all to God;" the other sometimes struck wildly, needed to be trampled underfoot by lions so great was its rage; sometimes subtly discreet in undermining, quiet delight in showing how full of shit their "holy" was; was tickled pink by falls, big and small, "You fucked up," "See, you're the same, will never change," "You're insane, still a fake." ”That’s your faith?” The two wrapped around one another for a fight, each whispering their beliefs, power only manifested in words Can you call the fight? |
photo of memorial for Portia Pollack on Dorgenois in New Orleans
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On My Time
Time to go to work but before moving out the door always look both ways; check up and down the block for murderers, "Oh, here comes one now! I'll wait til he passes... okay, phew." But I wasn't thinking like that Tuesday morning and he wanted my car; no chance to use my martial arts; dying that day was a surprise to me and to loving neighbors who rushed to my side while I went down deep; into magical last life-long moments where an ancient drum beat steady rhythm, elongated remembrances of friends, music, family til I let go, on my time. In loving memory of Portia Pollack 6/9/2021 |
No Defense
My baby's in my bicycle basket; stabbed this morning and now at six I'm arrested; the flies attested to passers-by of my crime. I knew he couldn't survive; thoughts came to destroy the new life before my eyes and there was no defense, against the hand that obeyed, no defense from our God who saves; living demons led the way. In loving memory of "Our Baby Boy" 7/18/2021 |
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Savior
He saved my life, Richard the poet. Listened, heard, cared enough to approach with nothing but a knowing that it was my time to surrender to let go or die in a lie in overdrive to careen crash collide; saw my INSIDE a spark flared cuz he CARED and was there to carry a message of a way to the LIVING God heart to heart derailed and electrified my mind surprised by joy of Presence after Step Five. |
Nicole
sky's slide from dark to deep lumen over roofs; open the shutters witness the glow we, Blue and me, look both ways up down street taught to feel energy by Sammy Black Cat wait for safe, linger on porch; there's a woman walking in the dark "morning, you happen to have a cigarette?" a familiar, couldn't-place-it voice... remembered about two Kools in the freezer "hold on" and passed the frozen smoke to the veiled-by-darkness sidewalk stranger; "thanks," a calm pause "what's your name?" "Nicole, don't I know you? "maybe..." we turned, both went on our way then in unison "Hey!!" the veil was raised and there we recognized rejoiced, she with her beer and smoke, me in my white pjs sun coming up at five forty five feeling electric alive. God choreographed our reunion no denying the Divine, can't deny the Divine! |
Nook and Cranny
Let me make one thing clear: I SUFFER from a spiritual sickness that demands a solution; back when, the three b's: boys, bulimia the bottle, provided the infusion poured freedom, relief into hot blood, flushed out fear's incapacitating crud; But I don't drink or think like my sister: the first one's in I'm on to number two before that first is close to through casing for more, out the door and the morning's remorse year after year voice of shame, guilt, fear doesn't keep me clear still reach time after time sell it all for a dime with excuses blank spots, justification cuz my mind has no fortification from redoing what's undoing my tangled soul, that's got a GOD-SHAPED HOLE; but old ideas surround that needed Higher Power shy away from Holy Ground church and state tower: inner voice said, "Baby, just lay your head on that toilet lid where vomited bowed down in filthy nooks and crannies all over town put your head there and say a prayer forget about the fancy stuff; you need me cuz staying sober is tough." over time some truth's found a way to win become the shoes I often walk in one day at at time, cuz y'all showed me a way, connect with the Divine in you, in me in ancestry; it's here, there, in every nook and cranny. |
photo of a mural in Los Angeles at Sunset and Micheltorena
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Dream
a blue whale ran aground huge nose hit cement wall of my community a new responsibility was necessary, commitment to be there with them not hide in my cozy pen retreat to scriptures or buttered toast but rather evidence the host share the bread live what is said; Penny's angry, Calvin's hurt Tookie's sulking Alvin's curt, Ashley's O.D'd Yanni's loaded Ben's broke V exploded; so pay attention to this spiritual dimension cuz God brought a blue whale, a spouting pastor vibration master, to my dream googled what it means led to the role Director assigned in these torn-up from the floor up times, ready to invite Him in, be present for divine direction led by a blue whale's sonar detection. |
Lawn Mower
Calvin's connection runs deep brought him to my window all else asleep but me who loves to read in early morn hours that day needing a resurrection needing protection we had a job to do down the sidewalk at Penny's corner (it's her lawn mover) who was mad as hornets cuz Calvin borrowed in advance on the lawn cash; the resentment meant grass was tall raggedy enough to hide pints of alcohol; Calvin didn't like that pride pushed back; paused Penny's kidney-pain monologue to pray: "Father God" he said while me and Ms. Penny quick bowed our heads, "guide us, free us, let us know your will" and the very situation got rectification right there on her porch; Calvin will mow the lawn again without her oversight lawn mower Spirit friend got it just right. |
The Disfigured Mother
children mocked her scarred skin called her spooky a weird woman ashamed I was til when older child finally told her of the teasing, sneering cruel jeering; "My child, when you were still a babe your late father went into a rage lit up our home to a fiery cage; I rushed midst flame and smoke, wrapped you in a blanket, ran out the door my hair caught fire but I didn't, couldn't stop til we emerged on the sidewalk; there I collapsed was scooped away while you cocooned were completely safe. the scars bear witness to my love for you, and bond me viscerally, with another who suffered for us, too; so let them mock, tease, ridicule for deep inside, where I'm graced to live my heart's healed, with only love to give. This piece is derived from a story I heard that moved me but I can't find it or remember where I heard it. Please email me if you know where it comes from! |
Third Step with Carley
beautiful child,
your face,
burdened by cares,
spark lit
as we shared
a prayer
a decision to be living stones
used by God
to build
a forgiven world.
beautiful child,
your face,
burdened by cares,
spark lit
as we shared
a prayer
a decision to be living stones
used by God
to build
a forgiven world.
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Boundaries
won't learn from you won't eat your food won't buy your goods won't drink your booze. leave me be won't ingest your creed won't congest my arteries with the air you breathe. boundaries! blazing walls of fire don't permit your entrance cut y'off with barbed wire |
Dream
way up over ice-ripple-wave water standing in a something that felt not there and you behind out of sight but I said, "look out over the bridge to the star blue night" conscious of being high high high and looked up with courage dizzy in Presence of such majesty way above with water way below where birds splashed - or were they people? don't know shifted my feet to remember the nothing I stood on but assurance "you are held" and I relaxed and beheld a sky skier to the right digging edges into ice. |
Lord, Give me a Spine!
when I saw Ashley yesterday I knew nothing was okay raggedy cough tiny shuffle-steps black mini skin-tight dress fuzzy black slippers opaque wall eyes; coming down from that house behind mine where she goes to smoke and now in five thirty five dark spinning-round red lights arrive in rhythmic pulse throb on patterned glass installed to thwart prying eyes I ask myself why didn't I interrupt her stupor shuffle with a hug, saturate her with love, speak to her heart, bring her inside? LORD! Give me a spine to speak love and do right in hard moments as guided by you. how's the world going to change if I don't stay awake! |
Zoom
put down her sewing listened fully felt her heart through the screen paying attention to me sensed fears, heard my need to confess how I'm so tired of hating our people of our capacity for cruelty with such innocence, such "nice" people, maintain the Caste; let me go under for a while, leave behind consciousness fall asleep to the lullaby rock a bye of good sincere intentions; but her loving transcended all that inner unrest; my sister, once so rejected now here she hears leans in, doesn't correct or chastise or try to fix just a gift of loving eyes that I will get to see the rest of my life whether lonely or plagued, whenever big feelings, insanity, come my way. |
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Eni's Final Blessing
buried in blankets brown, wise 95-year child eyes rise from sofa soft-cupped hand hovers sacred word murmurs over my chest drifts from left to right down to belly up to throat to give a final blessing echoed over chicos nightly family, friends, weekdays, weekends, hearts welcome hands that warmed more than a million tortillas with her love wise and gentle as a dove soon to pass through by the Hand of God’s love. . |
Clean
Penny fist-bams my door furious about lawnmower I feel no fear in her rage though she is yelling in my face; she's clean pissed no residue no sloppy glue sticking me to some ancient stew. In Loving Memory of Penny Vaughn 10/23/2121 |
Leaves
time like leaves is designed, a fluid stage for roles to play created in love by the Divine Choreographer Composer who conceives where and when she enters where and when she leaves. |
Rubies
today he confessed his true love, Ruby, connected to the Lord by a chord, a mother who knew the Job pattern fit her child, a wild spirit who climbed high who'd thrive then crash dive and emerge once more to more than survive, years ago a messenger saved a brown man's life he had a wife, Ruby and she, too, spoke and through her an L.A. Mexican excavated the entirety of a Mayan king with dignity a profile buried beneath the culture crushing cathedral built on Tenochtitlan. two raw Rubies uncut gems who lit lives of these beloved men the kind of deep-red love that ignites liberty permanently. |
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Time to Sleep
wash feet at evening to release the day from soles; head to toe outflow worries, fear, pride, through pores micro-doors what entered from streets, emotion's heat, let go the holy unholy ground that attached to burden Spirit down. |
Jubilee
Yesterday, the whole country was diagnosed ADHD by God Almighty and mandated treatment so every web site was deleted the TV's computer screens collected in the street and someone screamed, "a rose is blooming over here!!!" Oh my God!!!" and everyone ran and gave a loud cheer, "Yeah God!!!!" the billionaires shared showered everybody with stuff and money precious gems, metals, ores were all returned to Africa presidents, ambassadors doubled over laughing bus boys got to drive the Maseratis, cashiers ate caviar drank champagne for free all debt eliminated all dogs unleashed, and the debutante got to taste, really taste Mama's beans and feel see the beauty of that rose in her bones, in her toes. |
Easy Go
I have a mind that chops down trees in a milli second decrees "no utility!!" or negates shade tree's capacity to convert CO2 as oxygen, hold soil and cool community give sanctuary to squirrels, birds, bugs, bees; mind takes a precise path; first it doubts "no one would miss that tree." "what good does it do, really??" then it denies "this community would be better without me!!!” "too dominating, a show off!" then it dies as chainsaw hits does its duty turns to dust; what took 38 years to grow easily goes. |
Leggings
poison man released finally but cold weather returned late Octo-burrr "Where are those wonderful warm leggings?" sought high sought low realized they perhaps hide where poison resides... text to check comes reply "Yes" and phone floods with cries: "come home!" shudder soul for once more venom's at the door that's destroyed everything worthwhile in life before. God, guide the release of those leggings to know, you provide warmth, protection, when we abide under your direction, on your side as poison stealthily, persistently seeks cunning ways to get inside. |
Seer
lotsa-money man shape shifts energy dons disguise to be invisible in lush hotel he frequents; but cleaning lady casually asks "where you been?" she'd always seen his real - not the maitre d or fancy folks or friends, the One who recognized without bling, trappings of a king, had open-heart eyes. . |
In Time
the dancer was STUCK; with a partner, a thorn in her mind hijacked capacity for presence with promise of rhyme; each time she said, "no more" something supernatural yelled, "don't leave the floor!" slowly learned to let go realize from all sides her need for control before able to be with someone so free a man unwilling to surrender to be dictated steps she couldn't see had been programmed into her feet; over the years a need for four four gave way to release where next moves reveal a shifting groove to a man and woman the unpredictable but playful beat of divine choreography. |
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Never Alone
I need this poem to send to those, like me at times, who feel alone, disconnected from the sublime Presence of the Divine to wake us back up to truth of the unseen the poetry of essence not easy to believe that what is beyond our view is the way greater Reality |
Joe
Read your letter just now and want to say thank you for being the best you could be for yourself for us for community. Had come home from church grocery run laying on the sofa with Zora, the cat and saw the headlines. Hit me hard but no one would have known looking in the window. |