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Under Lies
a witness testifies loud and clear few hear, but snap shots of body, head, of what's behind, infrared insides scrutinize what underlies... “a child points up ‘mama, look!’ and all pause to see the cloud, the giant bee whatever she sees… yet, no one listens to me I've stood for tens of thousands of years pointing with purpose; white-light entities coached my crafters to in-form me with precision into being to speak non-verbally before Elohim designed a hologram of words to point with purpose with intentional lack of clarity substantiated in stone for those who hear to understand; so take a rocket into space and you'll find me. It's easy. Look for structure crafted by human hands possible to spy with the naked eye; It's right next to me. Google it! what do you see? what do you hear? of what do I speak?” like a child, I was manifested to be seen and heard! Get under the lie!" ”In that day, there will be an altar to the Lord in the midst of the land of Egypt, and a pillar to the Lord at its border. It will be a sign and a witness to the LORD of hosts in the land of Egypt.” Isaiah 19:19-20 |
dig
shovels gravel round midnight, metal scrape wakes as he curb carves sacred space for a soon-to arrive much-needed car agitation of anticipation stews brews need for escape sends man into street of double shotguns under moon lamp-light, a slender slice of fire energy getting free moves rhythmically hoes the tar concrete summons ancestors' beat til enough's released and we both finally get some sleep. |
tourist
songstress at Smoothie King in the mix thinking of you how we entered each other and Anita sang just because and your car, my queen were there you on about vocal mastery and now in her womb way up snuggled tight packed in the sing-along sold out bleachers her sweet love poured over us Holy Honey warm, convincing, true the Universe where you flew, lived couldn't give more than a tour and I'm grateful to have been a tourist graced with something new changed by the trip back home deeper in my skin the temple within a better songstress for it. |
cookie jar jail
where is the hot-stove defense that keeps me from getting burned the recoil God hard-wired inside my soul to protect my silly ass? Lord God! Save me from my self-indulgence, where I live in a cookie jar of constant craving constant caving in to small distractions mind goes leaves me hollow and back to square ONE day ONE chatter-racked slippery slope where I need you Lord. Revive my heart to LOVE, expand, to pour my self out into the ONE Great Reality of your Holy habitation in an Eternity not revolving around me! "For thus says the One who is high and lifted up, who inhabits eternity, whose name is Holy; 'I dwell in the high and holy place, and also with him who is of a contrite and lowly spirit, to revive the heart of the contrite." Isaiah 57:15 |
Valentine's Psalm
as above so below in 3 days Spirit built a Banquet Hall, temple, the whole Earth, Universe, High Priest’s mystical body; outside this sanctity I suffer and inflict pain a cycle of harm. the Door, when sought, always opens and Water-cleanse begins we are nourished by your Bread charged by your Light called by your Voice, grown in the Vine forgiven into relationship with you, your Resurrection, in us, us in you, you in the Father the Holy Tabernacle… as above so below, as around, so within. |
Valentine's Psalm 2
can't grasp who you are can't grasp quark truth unseen reality beyond me above my capacity to fathom, reach, touch, too deep too high too wide impossible... yet true impossible to believe for a mind too strong to let go so... turns all to mush and puddle to "the next right thing" to "the present" rather than to walk in this cathedral of energy embrace of love adventure in light as light, through light; guide me God out of my skin, my mark-missing sin into the true dwelling re-enter me LORD into your holy tabernacle to BE with you, in you, for you you in me, me in you, you in HE Thy will be done, SELAH |
Valentines Psalm 3
She values me? How can that be? This nobody bucket of grandiosity this waif of prayed-away insecurities that walks in you, LORD, confidently praying to give, to live outside bogus clutter mind refine this human who loves deeply! the greatest privilege is to get to know people, to hear them a blessing deeper than the deepest sea Never thought it would be me able to hear, see you your healing journey - was blind and now I see Praise God Praise my Valentine. |
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Pink Tutu
grandfather Sammy lifted pudgy me 1960 in pink tutu above the party I flew!! straight arms over head his giant smile those hands that held my tummy had been to war and are no more since 93; love lifted me! thank you Sammy! and thank you whoever gifted me that pink tutu, too. |
Smitten by E.
by candle's light asked for insight a Word to be freed from high jacked mind's tailspin dive "your heart was proud because of your beauty; you corrupted your wisdom for the sake of your splendor" prophet E spoke to gut love is tough that cracks this nut got through knife slice thank God not nice since platitude is deadly when in my insanity. awakened now looked round to see the larger thread where Spirit led and found I was not alone but with the Prince of Tyre who Milton said fell to the lake of fire pride's cost paradise lost of radiant stones of perfection's throne forgot he didn't give birth to himself forgot his role obscured by silver, gold, and wisdom's wanton ego to wage sneaky violence on those below... at the same time it was a portrait of my beloved friend not just me... master of material gain reads numbers, sees secrets, ins and outs to make wealth, wield clout with stealth wield wisdom too and use it to whip make friends want and then withhold.. anointed one loves but gets so so cold like me, too high to see the corruption from his beauty, the Prince of Pride taking him on a house-is-not-a-home ride simple rule momma might have said: ”my child, don’t play with the Prince of Tyre don’t play with fire!” more there is, yes indeed these bedevilments apply to greater society but for now, the prophet’s message has generated genuine humility, a miracle, for a beauty, a prideful, wise, woman like me. "your heart was proud because of your beauty; you corrupted your wisdom for the sake of your splendor" Ezekiel 28:17 |
love your neighbor
Ben and Vee have no water no heat, ac, so car's home baby in the back seat; 46 K from Ida long gone for the wrong fix now need 16 G for SWB cuz gramma's toilet ran and ran day and night and grand baby girl at 49 doesn't lift a finger spend a dime and here's Ben again knocks to ask and I snap, "I can't get back into that bullshit," and him sulking away and Vee needs to charge her phone and me saying yes and her sitting there a bullfrog talk in her boom box voice for ever... maybe I need to move to Vermont where neighbors ' behave themselves (don't shoot off guns sell drugs steal, beg, borrow, fuss and cuss in the street) but this is New Orleans it's my home now these are my neighbors and I try to do right but they try me and I have no illusion of being the nice white lady in the corner house... Miss Alma has thorns she certainly does. but I love big and pray for everybody and care and share as God guides me imperfectly but if I want to feel good about what a good person I am gotta move cuz lotsa folks here get on my every nerve. |
Ruffino
Guatemalan over a foot shorter than green-eyed me paints precisely progresses with care through stages of house repair CORAZON surrendered to craft lives with brother watch out for each other and grieve thieves who smashed pick ups late Friday left not a tiny hammer nothing but a hard worker hurt, hurt, so hurt... here, hard at work. |
Vet Trip
Sammy's 14 sits with care arthritis stiff gentle, aged clairvoyant sage vet's got a shot to ease that pain "just consider it" doesn't mention who stands to gain lists complications of the "cure" omits cost "invest in the comfort of your cat" meanwhile nothing left when they pass the hat for a neighbor with no heat nothing to eat asleep in the street damn! Let the cats, like me, get used to pain teach us to slow down and listen lean on canes and younger kittens rather than always fixin controllin' keepin things rollin'... so no pills for Sammy or me cuz when our appointments to pass on arrive Sammy and I'll be ready for our freedom-fly. |
Zulu Parade
secluded alone pain kept her inside and Mardi Gras called from days away "come to me!" fear-desire answered that day didn't know it was time to go just compelled her from within onto the porch the groove moved down stairs with care slow left...right sidewalk's blocked by grills, cars, folding chairs ice chests so street-walkered wheels bumpity bumped step... by step passed varied beats - of marching bands, boom boxes WWNO, motorcycle revs pot holes barbecue smoke family tents sexy garters, a red Charger Fedoras, caps, men's tattoos, kids soundly snooze under campers ladies in green red gold cleavage, legs bold, so bold baby dolls with parasols and there's my heart too in the mix courage! God's house of bricks vulnerable in the extreme but only kindness streams Mardi Gras motion is harmony with commotion calls her and everyone into its ocean. |
Yeast
unleavened bread necessary when you have to flee no time to wait watch the mystery of air entrapped puff up elasticity stretch make room for gas to craft fluffy bread to catch butter in crevices, jelly in craters teeth in textures oven pre heats to 350 hits heat expands "I am the bread" let it rise within me puff me not with grandiosity "look at me" but with readiness to bear witness to the reality of unseen air pockets of good God-ness that sustain a loving heart hover over creative connection that sustain the staff that guides, hems me in takes me to the table to partake in the overflow the yeast your bread in me let the kingdom come to the feast! |
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Elihu
his name means "my God is he" a listener waited his turn heard the elders before words surged his belly full ready to pop nothing could stop speech; his need for relief from the pounding pum pum only resolved by release so when Spirit moves today don't bridle and rein but Spirit obey and speak your gifts, open lips and give to the mystical body so people may live and feel be taken past woes just as Job was not consoled by the other three "amigos" your voice is needed and if you ask our Maker to speak through you your words will be true and give life anew, just like Elihu. "For I am full of words, the spirit within me constrains me, Behold, my belly is like wine that has no vent, like new wineskins ready to burst. I must speak, that I may find relief; I must open my lips and answer. I will not show partiality to any man or use flattery towards any person. For I do not know how to flatter else my Maker would soon take me away," Elihu as spoken in the Book of Job 32:18-22 |
Where's the Weeping?
pretends not to need a gate that swings when a guard sees it's her to enter plantation-island purity and watch CNN news past swamp-marsh moat pronounce "I'm woke!" but wait... her children were babes in 60's decade in a different but identical gated-golf-tennis country club place when they killed J.F. and M.l.K, Vietnam raged rebellion, a quest for liberation shook made the gate vibrate and now the privileged stand and proudly lay claim this time to being awake? remorse evade? where's the beg for mercy, the sobs and weeping for the years sleeping? |
Unwrap
wrapped tight by rules nothing could move, stir shift, whirl that closed-umbrellla-stiff rigid girl! come out! unfurl, wear that floral shirt that blows in the wind walk in time to Reggae singing out from the fruit shop; the owner loves to see stride-rhythm shift to the beat not predators just joy voyeurs and there goes a giant yellow motorcycle revving past with hip hop blast sees a head bob-nod as he cruised and wants nothing but a fleeting moment of presence acknowledgement; so take off the tape, unwrap the gift dare to participate!" |
Leo and the Nile
water flows and Your will moves forward, north a spine past precision stone lazered understandings, water running down past seven temple chakras rarely seen flowing river tune ears to touch wet skin to hear rush Spirit to feel energies heart to speak un-held knowings given space to be in communion with Lion, Tribe, Most High, Agunechemba Leo rise above Nile written in time the plan, story, not arbitrary we love to deny the truth of our spine but the River can not be unseen, unheard, it turns to face the rise tetelestai he will come, a second time. |
Impassible
wrestle won't release get gone move along like it should would will it if we could but still remains relentlessly on the brain heart will this Red Sea ever part? God assures what manifests on the Exodus is impossible without His Power "how's this impasse EVER gonna go?" you can't know beyond your ego so LET GO! rock in mantra "give it all" "give it all" pilgrims called to Gilgal sojourners' footprints and 12-stone altar now underwater where we walked out of wilderness into milk-honey where walls fall chances to trust gloriously sprawl in knowing we may be where where HE wants us through it all. "trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Be not wise in your own eyes, fear the LORD, and turn away from evil, It will be healing to your ego, and medicine to your bones," |
Two Birds
squatting in February sun's fire warmed through we two talked of this and that and, safe in knowing his heart is in You, confided how I sense a story unfolding on our street movement in a mystical body that heals for real of all cravings of all need for the first dose towards obliteration forgetting it no longer works forgetting the new purpose the healed are assigned to live into a vision of truth, light, a path for a life to be poured into and hear and share the route with others stuck in that cycle of "getting fucked up" when the going gets rough or smooth or accused of a bore; all races, colors, creeds gender identities necessary together and we looked up and two birds one black, one white were dancing way up up up saying YES to the vision YES to Presence YES to our day our friendship our God, his way. |
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child in a dream
a boy hologram black child... tired; I took his hand as we walked; he slowed as we crossed Orleans street and became a veil-paper-2-D doll even more exhausted energy spent so I bent to pick him up; he was lead meteor-stone heavy took all and more than what was in me every muscle every ounce every prayer to lay him on my shoulder where he dissolved, asleep on my body - tender breath on my neck. |
sect effect
was told she was blind so many times strained hard to see and did - saw more and more - made it impossible to conform the opposite effect wanted by those of her sect and defiance ensued drugs, booze, attitude... confused... what's got to happen for her to get free and for her to see herself truthfully? |
defensive attorney
ya know I'm assigned the role of defensive attorney for those left in the cold: those getting old, the addicts, blacks, Southern cracker jacks, demo, auto, bureau crats choose a side and I'll fight for the otherized marginalized even the 45's my job's to oppose your choice if your self-righteousness rubs my wood-grain splinter way not by what you say but by what I feel from your inner real so if I do agree (just because I realize I'm being a pain in the ass) it does not mean you're approved; my default's to hate the sinner love the sin since your defect let's me win... cuz I'm an addict too, on crack high of being right stone sober not tight... so... no mercy in me anywhere in sight.. "where's the kindness extended to me in my ignorance" as wise DJ says? |
Hmmm
a million poems be still and wait in the Spirit a memory that fills moment that calls to be uncovered coaxed out of its quiet nook: eye-catch with a child, plastic bag gone wind-wild, a chance meet with Emily a need with no ask and we both bask for the balance of the day's moments in the divine time, or the way Cooper crosses the floor humble-strut jaunty-light, or Taffy remembers Diana Ross as we wait in metal chairs while our loves heal in the buzz of therapy machines and memories of long-ago-line-dance Motown moments light us up; today's a watch-the-river day not one for fishing. poems swim down under and I... watch the water. |
On a Walk
to walk in the city is vulnerable; he doesn't see me? she passes oblivious caught in some mental net? others figure I'm nobody? "wait, she's a friend of so and so... you know..." "oh!" then they say "hello," just like when Mr. Furlaud put me on a bus in Penn Station in the 60's with hippie Clippy "oh, Clippy Bartow..." okay then, I know your family..." or sometimes I'm a type that’s yuck or politically not cool? Some decide I'm superfluous and choose to remove their energy entirely? And then we meet after a few weeks at the party and me, long forgotten, is cool today cuz I'm somehow here with these good people? It's all just a human thing, understandable but important to see so my identity doesn't depend on how you see or treat me, my role here doesn't dissolve, my huge love doesn't retaliate, reciprocate in hate or indifference or labels and categories but stays free and I can go for walks in the city. |
Daniel in the Lions' Den
we are swirl-spiral energy in clay jars, Daniel prayed to God and was prey to the mandate of the king manipulated into making an edict impossible to undo... and Daniel was thrown into the den "O Daniel, servant of the living God, has your God, who you serve continually, been able to deliver you from the lions?" "O king, live forever! My God sent his angel and shut the lion's mouths and they have not harmed me, because I was found blameless before him and also before you, O king, I have done no harm." the lions knew him, saw him felt his light. didn't trigger their appetite and he emerged in his clay jar intact. |
For Henry at Your Engagement to Carol
New Yorker like me, from Jamaica, Queens into photography transplant in New Orleans, as you join please accept this coin to celebrate love not hate; I pray you be blessed with a few more twenty fours to love and be loved, adore and be adored, keep taking shots of a host of friends keep sharin' with your people in our church with no steeple, keep shinin' light for others still lost in the fight... we all gettin' closer to that final door whether or not in stage four so Henry this coin is for you to invite God to do what He does and see you through lookin' fine so at the very least 39 comes true for you, too. With great love from your friend Robin |
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Ernest and Alvin in Flight
came by on the way to play basketball new dreads, full of school's-out warmth, "have any cashews, Ms. Robin?" "gotta a whole bag just for you," turn to hand them to Ernest at window when bolt he FLEW cross street without feet grandma'd about made it to the street caught her hand gently, so very gently cane unsteady mad as hornets about being house-bond decided to escape down determined to meet her sister (20 years gone)... Alvin flew too though shook the street with each pound and both over 6 feet walked quiet, tiny steps at her slow beat in summer heat to the corner, then joined hands to make a seat carried her back home tucked in bed came back to my place for Dr. Pepper and cashews before walking over to shoot some hoops. |
Gritty Integrity
all are tamed no more suggestions solutions bright ideas her way, truth, light her journey in life from mama eyes... too much suffering, pain, fatigue, no speech, gain yet from her deep within with gritty integrity... rejects storm-tossed "try-this" sea of pills, diagnoses, therapies, that further sabotage a life already pulled out from under... not including mama, friends, family well-meaning want to help, but burden her with more need to say "no" as nicely as possible in the face of needy sincerity from beloveds, from me. |
two wells
my shallow dispenses cups and drips and counts without me knowing and when you tug on my bucket on my time sometimes rage explodes for your capital crime "Lord, give me a new heart so I may serve thee; Lord, fix my heart so that I may be used by thee!" and the water from You, the One, the Well with no need to ration to skimp on portion You just GIVE so more can LIVE healing as we go never to thirst again LIVING WATER thank you brother I look to you, your well, to get well in midst of this troubled world, this wilderness, the wild, the dry without you we wither and DIE! |
Make Peace
kindness so deep they can't sleep for the weight of walking and breaking a blade 'bruising a reed..." one day may make peace, have to make peace with the inevitable injuries of being... the offending giddy from flattery, sudden cash, the oppressive over-protection from sickness, fear, the irrepressible jealousy of youth, health, wealth... the ambition for just a little more attention... like Constance, pray to love, "all the animals on the ark" they're all in me the snake, deer, sparrow, tiger, bee one day they'll find that lost ark and the enormity of what God has done and will do will jump-spark new hearts that always love, always forgive, always show mercy; but for now, kind one, til that day, wounded one, sleep my love in that beloved-to-God ark, trillions of cells and ask forgiveness and make peace with the inevitable injuries of being. |
seer
It's okay for me to see what I see I'm a seer (not a prophet) but awake to a degree in this current reality: people accuse me of negativity... but yesterday the sky was so so blue as I walked home from Walgreens with 2 bags of cashews - (one for the lady I offended the day before one for Tina whose Halloween pumpkin is rotting on her stair in April and her 40-something son stays next door...) and was about to turn and I said to You, "It's no coincidence the sky is so blue... excruciating beauty your way to say, 'I love you"" and I said to the elder who sat on his porch "So beautiful" and he knew, saw and we talked about that blue from You and I felt like a human and he put his right hand gently on his heart as we did part and I plodded off to leave the nuts; so this morning as all the hard things to see all the insanity is revealed... I'm not being negative, just seeing grimy grit and you had me remember it, the moment with the elder to reassure me, it's okay to see; it's your will for me, the beauty, dishonesty, deep love, and sometimes unconscious, sometimes vicious ugly. |
On Children
(inspired by Kahil Gibran's poem of the same name) and a woman who held her child too close asked, "Wise One, Mother Divine, would you speak of our children?" And she replied, "Your children? Oh, of course! I loooove them, glory gifts from beyond Spirits who long to be here, born within us yet, my beloveds, not ours be long to Life, to the Holy, to the One; So mamas, remember to watch the child you once were, who sought-fought her own way, to egg, fallopian tube, from sanctum womb, into crowded rooms, who needed mama's breast, and then… to let it be, needed the nest, and then… to release, who emulated mama's ways to then find her own; remember her journey so you might give space, hold space for your child's, for their own and know you are never ever alone but in a host of those who have gone before, (beloved mothers of all creeds, colors! Sojourner Truth, great grandma Gammy, Maya Angelou, Mother Mary) one great Body, one Source, one Energy; move with grace, faith through the joy, the fears, the grief, laughter, tears the awe, relief, pain beyond belief as their lives unfold and your own with, in, through our living God, becomes ever more clear as you watch their journey through the years;” Wise One paused, wrapped her arms around me: warm, gentle, strong, whispered in my ear: "Beloved mama, this "watch" I speak of will soften, diffuse the visceral need to intervene; Trust me, honey, Trust me my child. Trust me." |
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Psalm 23?
The LORD is my good shepherd I shall not want more bling or things to change or to stay the same to feel or not feel pain to laugh or cry to weaken or thrive… He makes me commit to slow, “baby, slow down, eeeezy…” He leads me deep within my own skin, a path of zillions of tiny lights... He restores my soul... He shows me right ways to go to bolster his good name. Even though I move through chasms of fear, mental torture, hurts, painful awakenings to my own blindness, I fear no evil for You are with me, Your corrections make me feel seen and loved. You set a table of goodness just for me, for all the judgmental neighbors to see. You anoint my head with the sunlight of the spirit, pour honey sweet over my tired mind. I sing thank you at the top of my lungs. Surely goodness and mercy are with me all the days of my life as I dwell in your house now and forevermore. |
Sammy Cat at Sukkoth
already slender long-leg body has become a booth wind and fan blow through and smooth back small packs of thinning black scraggly... his moment approaches... last breath imminent lost in wilderness eyes ask “why?” he too, unsuspecting, is to be dismantled, booth undone remembered to earth separated from rickety-bone home the inexplicable truth and we watch a three quarter moon, and wonder at its order, rhythm, the not-steady beat of many days walking, moving, provided for, in desert shoes to this Jordan Exodus from Egypt to Promised Land by the Mighty Hand and sweet, sweet Sammy’s barely perceptible breath continues not quite ready to cross. |
Sure House
It's a guarantee if we follow thee your command-ments so let's get some clarity about what you mean... by LOVE! Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments. |