God, the "Great Iconoclast."
  • Alma Turner
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The Gospel of Thomas

Sayings of Jesus: 67, 68, 69


Saying 67
Jesus said: One who knows everything else but who does not know himself knows nothing.

Only sobriety has allowed me to have an experience with getting to know myself. I watch. I experience jealousy, anger, fears that I have no control over. I see myself sleepless, in tears, seeking approval, obsessing when I don't get it, fearful, viscously critical . On the other hand, I see myself pray, surrender to the good and thereby weep for friends and the world, dance in the light, play and laugh, embrace heartily, forgive, be effective and beyond grateful. I was always smart but... without the 12-Step design, almost died, and did spiritually die.

Saying 68
Jesus said: Blessed are you when they hate and persecute you. No place will be found where they persecuted you.

Approval is overrated, craved, begged for. But what happens when I take a stand? People disagree and do persecute in their own overt or sneaky ways. Sometimes it's a sarcastic comment, others it means the loss of a job, marginalization, gossip.  Sometimes it can mean extreme physical suffering or the loss of your life. Just look at Malcolm X, Patrice Lumumba, Robert Kennedy, or Rigoberta Menchu.  To speak truth in love, at times to power, is to live into faith and to be stripped of false Gods because goodbye to everyone who can't stand hearing your message whether its an expression of gratitude to a God that someone else believes is bullshit, political action that threatens the status quo, educational efforts that expose false paradigms, interpersonal emotions that a partner does not want to hear, or confronting a child about spending too much time on a cell. The "place" is gone, can not be found. If I am true to myself, my God, my principles, I'm free and I will not carry that dagger in me. It's wound is healed; I am risen. I am free. 

Saying 69
Jesus said: Blessed are those who have been persecuted within themselves. They have really come to know the Father.  

This is so shocking and so affirming. Sometimes I wonder if people have surrendered to the same God I have surrendered to. It's not an easy ride within. I mock myself. I throw stones at myself. I see all my ugliness and struggle with it, wrestle. I'm constantly seeing new pockets of pus surfacing... And it is that very process that does continue to take me to the Father, to God, to a relationship with a Power that sees and loves me as I am, behind my masks.  I don't take medication to relieve the inner persecution. I have come to see it, know and expect it, need it too because it takes me to new levels with consciousness, with forgiveness, and with my Creator. It is what it is.

Blessed are those who are hungry in order to fill the bellies of the needy. 

I am relentless hungry for the process to bear fruit, take seed in another. I want to "feed the sheep," "the lambs" who need a solution to the persecution from without and from within. . 
I am also hungry for a new experience each day... this is the day the "dis-ease" invariably shows up with its pettiness, meanness, insensitivity, blame, fear.  Some times are much harder than others, of course. Some years are harder than others. Surrender to God seems to keep me hungry for more God. Not sure why it is that way for me, but that's my truth. 




  • Alma Turner
    • Alma Turner
    • Site Overview
    • Alma's Blessings
  • 12 Steps
    • Step 1: Humility >
      • Step One Questions
    • Step 2: Hope
    • Step 3: Faith
    • Step 4: Honesty
    • Step 5: Trust
    • Step 6: Willingness
    • Step 7: Surrender
    • Step 8: Forgiveness
    • Step 9: Justice >
      • Amend White to Black
    • Step 10: Perseverance >
      • Fear Watch
    • Step 11: Contact
    • Step 12: Service
  • Poems, Prayers, Music
    • Beloved Poems by Others >
      • I Stand at the Door by Sam Shoemaker
      • The Guest House by Rumi
      • The Invitation by Oriah
      • Invictus
      • Elohai Neshama
    • Poems by Alma >
      • Poems 2017-2020
      • Poems 2021 >
        • Prayer Poems
        • Poems Early 2021
        • Poems September 2021
        • Poems October 2021
        • Parables and Songs
        • Clay Haiku
      • Newer Poems
      • Injustice Poems
    • Big Book Prayers
    • Music >
      • Roberta Flack
      • Marvin Gaye
  • more
    • Rowdy Beauties >
      • Rowdy Beauties Bible Study N'awlins
      • Rowdy Beauties Bible Study Zoom
      • Rowdy Beauties Resouces >
        • Resources for Chapters 1-4
    • Disciplines >
      • Fasting
      • Lectio Divina and Centering Prayer
      • Reading!
      • 12 White Steps
    • The Gospel of Thomas
    • Psalms >
      • Psalms 23, 46, 91, 139
      • Psalms 121, 1, and 32
    • Bible Thoughts >
      • Genesis >
        • High Priest
        • Jacob is Israel.
      • Prophets >
        • Isaiah 30
        • Isaiah 54
        • Jeremiah 31:31-35
      • Frederick Douglas
      • Jesus >
        • Brown or Black
        • Teacher
        • Son of Man
        • Activist
        • High Priest
        • Innocent
        • Lynched
        • Alive
        • Sayings >
          • Sayings 1-3
          • Sayings 4-6
          • Sayings 7-9
          • Sayings 10-12
          • Sayings 13-15
          • Sayings 16-18
          • Sayings 19-21
          • Sayings 22-24
          • Sayings 25-27
          • Sayings 28-30
          • Sayings 31-33
          • Sayings 34-36
          • Sayings 37, 38, 39
          • Sayings 40, 41, 42
          • Sayings 43, 44, 45
          • Sayings 46, 47, 48
          • Sayings 49, 50, 51
          • Sayings 52, 53, 54
          • Sayings 55, 56, 57
          • Sayings 58, 59, 60
          • Sayings 61, 62, 63
          • Sayings 64, 65, 66
          • Sayings 73, 74, 75
          • Sayings 76, 77, 78
          • Sayings 100, 101, 102
          • Sayings 103, 104, 105
          • Sayings 106, 107, 108
          • Sayings 109, 110, 111
          • Sayings 112, 113, 114
    • The Symbol >
      • The Circle and Triangle
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